I don’t actually enjoy being late, despite it’s frequency in my life. On this cool cloudy evening as I lay on my bed, my nose stuffed and running at the same time, eyes shut, and feet underneath the quilt while I waited for sleep to settle in. As I heard the clicking of shoes around the house my body abruptly returned from that cloudy near-dream space to reality. I decided to make the most of the time and get off my bed before I missed church. Declining any ice cubes in my hot peppermint tea (because what’s the point) I found a seat near my usual spot just during the last song. Then our missions pastor got up, brought up a missionary from South Africa who spoke for a bit, and our teaching pastor then followed. We open to Psalm 96 and I immediately found my green pen to begin circling the mentions of “all nations” throughout the chapter. Mission. We going to talk about mission, something that I’ve been passionately excited about for years. Then I remembered back to my personal time with God today. I had read Matthew 28 and Romans 15 which are each text about missions, The Great Commission and ministry to all peoples as quoted in the Old Testament, respectively. Maybe God would use tonight to call me to Spain tonight or give me new vision for what country I will move to next! To be fair, in reading Romans 15 Paul says that he’s going to stop in Spain while on his missional tour through the Mediterranean. Always forgetting that passage mentions Spain I’m usually trying to read into it having some magical meaning opposed to it’s original intent. But we were talking about mission so I told my buddy next to me, and Jesus, that I was down to hear whatever the Lord had to say.
With a box of tissues at my feet I listened intently. They weren’t there because I was about to cry but rather to absorb the runoff of my constant sniffling. As I listened to the message the pressure in my head made it a bit more difficult to capture everything. I sat taking notes. God is Creator, Fearsome, Savior, Holy; many attributes listed and while the temptation is to add an etcetera at the end of that list it simply isn’t the case. Each of these attributes describes Him. I remembered reading that when we see Jesus (Matt 28:17) it leads us to worship Him. When we worship, we are called to train others everywhere to do the same—The Great Commission. As the preaching of the word ended numerous people throughout the room raised their hand to surrender to Jesus. What an exciting event to witness. In the middle of the prayer and praise response I paused and I recognized something. Despite recently applying for a new job I’ve not gotten any final confirmation. Growing anxious about my current job I was starting to get nervous. I know that since returning from Turkey God has called me back to the restaurant that I had opened in 2009 and I’ve been working there again for almost 18 months. I knew that He brought me back there because He had work to be done there; for some reason He wanted to use me. Up to this point, I had no specific direction that it was time to leave. I certainly want to, but despite the obstacles and issues I’ve encountered there He still has me there. But tonight I surrendered it to God; I said that if this other job didn’t open up as I’d been hoping that I would be willing to work there and continue to be the light in a place that only seems to be growing more dim. If he has me there to bring one person to meet Jesus and that doesn’t happen for another six months, or year, or however long, that’s okay, because that one person is worth any of the (illegal) woes I encounter from my employer.
Surprised at my own prayer the service ended and I walked to my car. With my iPhone in hand preparing a text message my phone vibrated and an email notification rolled across the top of my screen. The manager who I’d interviewed with ten days ago just made contact. Immediately the preview displays, “First, let me apologize for the late…” my heart sank. After four interviews over a period of five weeks, followed by ten days of silence this was not what I wanted to hear. I finished the text message and opened the email. Standing under the night sky in the parking lot I brushed through the apology. Skimming the email there it was, “orientation pushed to March”, it could’ve been sung out by the stars from the sky above. "Yes, yes! Praise you God!" I shouted. A friend was standing nearby and shared the news. In sharing with her I realized that not more than ten minutes beforehand I was surrendering the entire situation and told God that whatever he had I was game for. He is so good, gracious, and merciful. Why does He give me such blessings? I certainly don’t deserve it; I’ve done nothing to earn it. But I will praise God for it!
Psalm 96:3-4 “Tell of His glory among the nations, His wonderful deeds among the peoples, for great is the Lord and greatly to be praised; He is to be feared above all.”
